Laugh a little
Isn’t marriage wonderful?
- Marriage is the number one cause of divorce. Statistically, 100% of all divorces started with marriage!
- “I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always.”
- “I haven't spoken to my wife for 18 months. I don't like to interrupt her.”
- Marriage is a 3-ring circus: Engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.
- The last fight was my fault. My wife asked, "What's on the TV?" I said, "Dust!"
- In the beginning, God created earth and rested. Then God created man and rested. Then God created woman. Since then, neither God nor man has rested.
- Why do men die before their wives? Because they want to.
- A beggar walked up to a well dressed woman shopping in Brent Cross and said "I haven't eaten anything in four days." She looked at him and said, "God, I wish I had your willpower."
- Do you know the punishment for bigamy? Two mothers-in-law.
- Son: “Is it true, Dad, I heard that in some parts of Africa a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?” Dad: "Not just in Africa, son. That happens in every country.
- The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once.
- First guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!" Second guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive."
- Q: How do most men define marriage? A: An expensive way to get laundry done for free.
- Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.
- If you want your wife to listen and pay undivided attention to every word you say, talk in your sleep.
- Then there was a man who said, "I never knew what real happiness was until I got married; and then it was too late."
- A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" And the father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying.